the worlds gone mad my local dep ran out of beer

I had to go to a gas station to buy beer and I bought 5 cases

last time I bought anything in bulk it was faygo and my blood sugar skyrocketed so much my doctor wanted to put me on insulin

my doctor won’t see me all appointments are done on the phone and my sugar levels dropped enough for her not wanting me on insulin anymore so that’s great

some people are worried about toilet paper not me I am worried about beer

a world without beer would be a world like drunkalos (colorless) to me 

anyways god bless ninjas and don’t forget to wash your hands thoroughly often and cough in your elbow and vote for Trump in November  

YouTube Video George Carlin – Germs, Immune System   

Was at someone’s house the other day and they was watching WWE. Empty seats. It was so weird you could literally hear every sound in that ring. The wrestlers were silly as well they still cupped their hands over their ears like the crowd was cheering. 

2 weeks paid off work. 

Shits getting serious. 

Prolly gonna visit Lancaster by the end of this week if it’s not quarantined… good thing I’m in the fucking holler. 

YouTube Video Afro Samurai AMV (I’m the baddest man alive)

https://youtu.be/eOp1TM5GoDk

YouTube Video Woman licks toilet seat in Corona-virus Challenge – TomoNews

on a real note, now it’s the time to fucking tip 

tip your local barista tip your delivery man a little extra these days they what’s keeping this shit afloat 

and much props to all the nurses in this world, I am quite close to a few and they are heroes right now putting their lives at risk to help other’s they are the soldiers in the corona war

if you can give money or donate to local food banks and help the elderly they need it most right now

sadly this pandemic is robbing us from touching a loved one people think twice about hugging their own mother these days, but reach out anyways use the phone my cell provider gave me free long distance calls during this pandemic and I made some calls I otherwise would not have, keep in touch without actually touching someone it’s a great moral boost.

and most importantly god bless 

Man, the writers of that comic… lol… talk about punchable faces. I pity them.

So my wife is a teacher and off with pay. I am still working a lot at the dispensary. Fine by me for now. We get calls all damn day asking if we are open. The most infuriating thing is that panicky people asking the same question 4 times in 4 different ways.

“Are you open?”

Do I sound like I’m open?

“Are you guys going to be open?”

As of now, yes, we are open. As of tomorrow, your guess is as good as mine. 

“But will you be open on Saturday?”

What did I just say? We don’t know anything beyond this current day of openness that we are sharing on this telephone machine.

“So are you going to be open then!?!?”

Always remember to fuck off, ma’am…. and sorry for assuming your gender. Just kidding, I’m not sorry. 

But piggybacking off of Smack, we are busier than we have been since the end of summer last year, and indeed the tips are getting pretty nice. I’ve noticed a lot of people are panicky and some seem afraid to admit that they’re afraid. Then you have your constant conspiracy theorists. 

We are, as of yesterday, required to wear gloves and not let anyone in unless they use our hand sanitizer. We cannot let them smell or even see inside containers. The longer we comply, the longer we stay open.

So if anyone needs a last-minute weed stock, come on down. We are open, at least today we are. Always call first. 

the_bleak _smack said
panic people the world is over 

Marvel comics has 2 new superheroes Snowflake and Safespace…

SCREENTIME got his powers from “internet gas. He got his powers from internet gas, and not ONCE did u think to name him SHITLORD…” MAGOG

YouTube Video Marvel Comics Is Stunning & Brave